Idols.
In this day and age, the first thought in our minds is celebrity's, someone we admire. Not so much the idols of old, where people would make something from wood, gold, silver to bow down and worship it-actually there are still people that do that today. In the Bible, many made idols and expected this man made thing to bring them rain, food, whatever their "need" was, they asked this..object for. I read it and think, that is so stupid. I don't buy something from Pottery Barn, bow down to it, and expect it to fulfill me. Except-if I was to dig deep in my soul, I actually have more idols than I realize. I'm working through a study at church called Stuck. It caught my attention because I know there are areas in my life I get stuck-many areas. One that was brought up recently is insecurity and fear of people. At the risk of looking like a fool here, it is a problem I deal with. To be bluntly honest-I worry about what others think of me. Growing up I used to look at everyone's freckle free face and wonder what was wrong with me, thinking that everyone thought I was ugly because of it. I have a hard time meeting new people for fear they won't like my appearance or personality, to the point that I stay in my shell and don't meet any new people. When I do branch out, I will go home and stress over saying-or not saying-the right things, did I dress well enough... did they accept me? This plagues me to the point that I'm unsure of how to act around others the next time I see them and usually wait for some cue I'm good or "in".
I have made this an idol in my life.
The author of Stuck gave the visual of a sit 'n spin. I'm on this sit 'n spin thinking about what I looked like, said, didn't say, whether I was accepted-for what? What can come from any of this that will add a day to my life?
In reality its taking away.
My focus should always be vertical. My first and foremost thoughts should rest on God alone. My worry over this insecurity..this fear.. has given it more value than the God of the universe. I can't live for my selfish vanity of being "okay" with people, I am here for a purpose. To live a life of worship to the Most High God, to share His love with others, I cannot waste another moment of my time with this idol.Galatians 1:10 If I were still trying to please man,I would not be a servant of Christ.
I can't do both. I am not perfect but today-I chose to go vertical, forget my made up thoughts of others of me and who I am. I know whose I am-I am His and He loved me so much, He sent His son to die for me.
I want my life to be all out, not held in by fears. Time to get uncomfortable.
